It's 11 a.m. and I'm done. Done in. Done for the day. Just plain done. I feel like I've given everything I've got and that I've got no more left to give. But here's the problem. I have two kids. I have to find more to give, because they're going to demand that. And they deserve that. Whether they'll get that is another story.
Here's how my day has gone so far, in a nutshell. Bear decided he wasn't going to school today, and he was adamant. He's missed a lot of school lately for one reason or another, so I was equally adamant that he was going. I did my best to listen to him and sympathize with his concerns. I tried to find solutions to what was bugging him. I explained, I pleaded, I snuggled. I did everything. And when nothing else worked, I informed him that if he didn't get dressed, I would get him dressed. You can imagine how that went over.
Bear did eventually get dressed.
Correction...we eventually got Bear dressed. Yes, we. The ODD Dad is working from home today, so he pinned Bear down while I dressed him. Again, you can imagine how that went over. I don't advise pinning your child down to dress him if you don't have to, because it's a pretty miserable process for all involved. It started with just me trying to get him dressed, but between his kicking, screaming, crying and writhing, it took me about 5 minutes just to get his underwear on. That's when I called in the reinforcements.
Once we got Bear dressed, he informed us that he was going to hurt his friends at school so that he could get sent home. Last time he threatened that, I kept him home, but I can't do that everytime. Is he all talk? No idea. Guess we'll find out.
So The ODD Dad carried a struggling Bear out to the van (and I removed the snow brushes after Bear tried to club me with one) and off he and I went to school. The ODD Dad and I had agreed that he would call the school as soon as I was out of the driveway to warn them that we were on our way. (I figured it was the least I could do.) I wasn't sure if I'd need help getting Bear into school, and they're extremely supportive that way. The hand-over went well, and they'll be keeping a close eye on him today.
Did we do the right thing? No clue.
Then on to Stitch. Poor Stitch gets put into his crib for safekeeping when Bear is melting down, and he doesn't like that very much. Stitch is more of a free-range kid, so he doesn't really like being stuck in one place. Add Bear's yelling, screaming, door slamming and toy throwing, and Stitch sometimes gets a little frightened.
Today is a daycare day for Stitch, so after I dropped Bear off I came back home and picked up Stitch. Stitch only started in daycare last week, and he goes two or three days a week. He's settling in well, but it's still pretty new to him. He has a great time once he's there, but that didn't stop him from starting to cry as soon as we pulled into the parking lot. ARE YOU KIDDING ME????? Cause that's what I needed today. Then he clung to me, still dressed in his snowsuit and his puppydog hat with the ears on it, with tears streaming down his face. It was all I could do to not bring him back home with me, but I didn't. Instead I turned and walked out, listening to his crying as the door closed behind me.
Then I came home and wrote this. And now that I've shared it, I feel a tiny bit better. I still feel emotionally exhausted, but now at least I can concentrate on getting some work done while the kids are gone. The school hasn't called and neither has the daycare, so the kids must be OK. We're lucky that both our children are in loving, nurturing environments, and I just have to keep reminding myself of that.
They're OK. They're OK. They're OK.
And soon, hopefully I will be too.